This Moment Does Not Define You

Hi guys, I am so sorry for been away from here for a while. I went for NYSC camp,then my job can be really tasking most times. Please bear with me for going ON and OFF (so shy right now. I will try my very best to be showing up weekly. I am learning to balance it.

 

“Things and conditions can give you pleasure but they cannot give you joy, joy arises from within.”

I struggled with low self-esteem and insecurities for 5years or more until I understood life through Christ Jesus. Well I have not really recovered but I am in recovery, I am dealing and I am living again. One of the major issues was my so much concentration on the physical and temporary sides of life.

In my mind, I over-emphasized the prominence of my body. I put the appearance of my body, and how I felt about my performances and my position, above my true self, underlying nature.

Back then, I used to be an average student, I considered myself to be a failure, I thought that was all I could be, people around me weren’t helping matters, they segregated me from all the clicks. In fact, my spoken English got affected terribly because I couldn’t speak confidently, like I used to mix past tense with present tense, replace singular with plural. I was the joke everywhere I go.With all of these complicated things, so getting over how I already felt about myself was never gonna work. I just lived in isolation and hide myself from being noticed, I suffered all the pain in silence my parents never knew, they even scold me each time i don’t do things right. I was overwhelmed with that moment of my life, it turned me to a liar, because i couldn’t express myself, I just lie about everything to save myself, I cultivated a lot of bad habit in the process. 

That moment defined me, reshaped me from the real me.

From my experience, I would treat passing thoughts, feelings, and emotions as vital, I mean it is a life and death matter.

I did not realize or appreciate my crucial and enduring self, which (I now get it) exceeds the short-lived states of the physical realm.

NOTE: Be able to separate your true self from your passing thoughts and feelings.

A massive part of recovery and self-discovery is the ability to separate your identity and the surface mental mess that blocks your view of reality.

I realized that I am not my body, my circumstances, my position, my looks , my scars, my wrongs and my insecurities. Yeah,  kind of weird, but cool and life-changing. I am much more than just my physical form.

Now I am not saying that I am really some waif-like spirit, floating on the imaginative current of an indefinable world (that would be cool though).

What I am saying is that my physical self, my body, my fleeting feelings and thoughts do not define me and likewise you.

 

Here is what the scriptures says concerning this;

But the lord said to Samuel, Look not on his appearance or at the height of his stature , for I have rejected him. For the lord sees not as man sees; for man looks on the outward appearance, but the lord looks on the heart. (1sam 16:7)

Let not yours be the merely external adorning with elaborate interweaving and knotting of the hair, the wearing of jewelry, or changes of clothes; But let it be the inward adorning and beauty of the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible and unfading charm of a gentle and peaceful spirit, which is not anxious or wrought up, but is very precious in the sight of God. ( 1pet  3:3-4)

Rejoice and exult in hope; be steadfast and patient in suffering and tribulation; be constant in prayer. (Rom 12:12)

I am not just me sitting here typing this blog post. I am not me who ate noodles with a whole lot of pepper and egg for breakfast and launch. I am not me who will take hundreds of snaps and pictures in about five seconds. (LOL)

I am a collection, a whole melting pot of things and thoughts and feelings and actions and ideas and emotions. I am now and then and I am more to come. Now, sit back and picture yourself better from what you are now…. it Is not just about this MOMENT. 

You are so much more than what you see and how you feel right now.

If you accept and embrace this way of thinking this “I extend past the fleeting, physical now“ it makes it so much easier to accept yourself. If you make a mistake, you can just brush it off and move on.

You might have made that mistake, but that mistake does not make you.

I am not dismissing how you feel and what you think in the present moment. Being present and aware of your thoughts and feelings is crucial for happiness, as well.

But your whole world expands when you stop confining yourself to these drifting, passing mental whispering. They come and go, and they may help to form who you are, but they are not what you are or all that you have to offer. Not in the least.

Hey friends,  so the next time you feel like crap whether you feel bloated or embarrassed or rejected or not good enough or ashamed just remember, what you feel right now is not the whole you. What people see right now is not the whole you. 

This moment will only define and defeat you if you let it.

Yaayiiii Peace

Kore